Why This Woman Married Herself

Grace Gelder

No, she’s not just crazy…

We’ve all read about those objectophile folks who’ve married ferris wheels (no really, his name was Bruce and their bond was strong and steely), Volkswagen Beetles and there was even a woman who tied the knot with a bridge. Yep. But have you ever heard of someone officially marrying themselves? (I say ‘official’ in that she held an actual ceremony and wore a traditional white dress) Us neither. Though it sounds a bit strange, this woman’s reasons for tying herself to, well, herself, kind of makes sense. Stay with us.

After six years of singledom, British gal Grace Gelder decided she’d been through quite the personal journey and that it was time to make a commitment to herself, according The Guardian. Speaking to the paper about her recent nuptials, Gelder, a photographer, explained that she was surrounded by love and support, though a few close pals joked that it sounded a little narcissistic. Why would someone want to marry themselves?

“It’s about making this pact or promise to yourself and then somehow enacting that in how you live your life from that day on.”

Grace Gelder throwing her wedding bouquet.

“More recently I’d been on a journey of personal development using meditation, dance, and performance to increase my self-awareness.”

One fateful day last November, whilst enjoying a quiet moment on a park bench, Gelder asked the all important question to herself. To her own delight, she said yes. She planned the whole thing with the help of a friend, keeping things low-key. To Gelder’s surprise, she was greeted by about 50 friends and family members who were on hand to celebrate the occasion. As for the big ‘I now pronounce you’ moment? She kissed herself in a mirror.

“Obviously, if you’ve just announced you’re marrying yourself, it is plainly a statement of self-love, and I was under no illusion how self-indulgent that might appear… But I was completely comfortable with my motivations” said Grace to The Guardian.

Many will assume that this is her idea of feminism, but she says it’s not. It’s more about loving herself, than her lack of male companionship.

“Why not an example to men too? I really don’t see it as any kind of feminist statement, but creating a wedding of this kind on my own terms felt incredibly empowering.”

Though it’s typically unheard of, and it definitely wouldn’t happen on these Irish shores (we’re far too straight and narrow), is it really that crazy an idea? While we might not need to go through with an actual ceremony, Gelder’s actions are certainly a reminder that self love really is the most important kind of love. How you treat yourself, and your relationship with your self will be of huge significance in your life and your relationship with others. You don’t need a ring, but you do have to make that commitment to yourself. Isn’t it nice that someone could arrive at a point where they’re at total peace with themselves?

What’s your take?


(image credit: top photo – Nick Cunard, The Guardian, middle photo: Amy Grubb)

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