A few months ago, a blogpost comparing consent to tea went viral, its simplicity getting across a hugely important issue. The blogger, Rockstar Dinosaur Pirate Princess, posted her powerful comparison last March, writing, amongst other things,
“If they say “No thank you” then don’t make them tea. At all. Don’t make them tea, don’t make them drink tea, don’t get annoyed at them for not wanting tea. They just don’t want tea, ok?
“They might say “Yes please, that’s kind of you” and then when the tea arrives they actually don’t want the tea at all. Sure, that’s kind of annoying as you’ve gone to the effort of making the tea, but they remain under no obligation to drink the tea. They did want tea, now they don’t. Sometimes people change their mind in the time it takes to boil that kettle, brew the tea and add the milk. And it’s ok for people to change their mind, and you are still not entitled to watch them drink it even though you went to the trouble of making it.
“If they are unconscious, don’t make them tea. Unconscious people don’t want tea and can’t answer the question “do you want tea” because they are unconscious.”
The Thames Valley Police have worked with Rockstar Dinosaur Pirate Princess to use her words for their new #ConsentIsEverything campaign, which is attempting to educate people on consent. Offering someone a cup of tea is such an ordinary and commonplace occasion. Using it as a metaphor for sexual consent is something that should make the matter clear to everyone. You don’t force tea on someone. Blue Seat Studios turned the blogpost into a short video, which you can watch above. It’s a powerful and necessary for all watch.
If you are affected by any of the issues covered in this article, contact the Dublin Rape Crisis Centre 1800 77 88 88 / drcc.ie