Iconic actress Goldie Hawn may not be the first public figure that comes to mind regarding sound relationship advice, but then again, the star does have some decent knowledge of what it takes to make a partnership work – she has been with fellow actor Kurt Russell for over three decades (and was married twice before). It’s safe to say that this celebrity pairing is one of Hollywood’s most enduring couples, but there have always been some raised eyebrows when it is remembered that they never married.
In a new interview, Hawn decided to impart a few words of wisdom as to why her 32-year relationship has been so successful, and what she thinks make solid partnerships last. Marriage, she says, is not or should not, be the focal point of a relationship: “A lasting relationship isn’t about marriage,” she said in an interview. “It’s about compatibility and communication. And you both need to want it to work.”
“Intention is the key,” Hawn continued. “It’s also about not losing yourself in each other. Being together, two pillars holding up the house and the roof, and being different, not having to agree on everything, learning how to deal with not agreeing. Everything’s a choice.”
She added that both people have to “want it to work” if they’re going to be successful as a couple. “You have to want it. Both people have to want it,” she said, adding that she told her daughter Kate Hudson to just “go at it her way,” when it came to her life and relationships.
“We as mothers have to be able not just to pass the baton, but to be able to give free reign for your daughter to grow, to make mistakes,” she added. “Doesn’t mean they’re not watched. But it means that they’re honoured. You watch them become individuals,” she added.
“That’s what being a mother is also, is witnessing. Just be there. You don’t always have to power over,” she said. “I believe that this is one of the most important things as a parent you can do… to let go, in times so that these children can formulate their own identity and relationships.”
She also said that she gives her daughter “zero advice” when it comes to parenting her two children.
“I did it my way,” said Hawn, “[and] she’s doing it her way, but she saw a very good example with the both of us.”
Via Harper’s Bazaar