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Thinking about Dakota Johnson occupies much more of my time than I’d like to admit. She’s a bit of a celebrity conundrum to me. From her famous “I love limes”/”I’m actually allergic to limes” dilemma to her incredibly awkward interview with Ellen DeGeneres and her notoriously secretive relationship with Coldplay frontman, Chris Martin; it’s all of interest.
And that’s without even mentioning her famous stepdad (Antonio Banderas?!?!?), her fringe, her fashion or her friendship with Olivia Colman – the latter of which really intrigues me.
Co-stars on the recent Maggie Gyllenhaal-directed movie The Lost Daughter, it’s there that the duo first became close. Cast as Nina and Leda respectively, they form part of a truly stellar lineup for the new psychological drama whose credits also include our favourite normal person, Paul Mescal. Shot during the height of the pandemic in 2020, long work days combined with the subsequent glamorous-on-the-outside but very taxing-underneath-it-all press tour sealed their bond and before either one really knew what was happening, Johnson was giving Colman her first tattoo.
Recalling the, frankly quite bizarre, story to Town & Country recently, Colman confirmed that it was her first tattoo ever and happened after the cast and crew had partied it up at NYC hotspot Café Altro Paradiso. “The thing is, people are not behaving normally,” Johnson noted. “If you go to a party, you f*cking rage.” And rage they did, with Johnson and fellow actor Peter Sarsgaard providing the playlist that had everyone dancing to Talking Heads and The Cranberries.
The raging continued long into the night too and ultimately culminated in Dakota whipping out a stick-and-poke kit and branding Colman with her work. “Maybe it was me being completely seduced by this gorgeous person and wanting her to think I was cool,” Colman said. “Or maybe it was my midlife crisis.” Either way, it matters not to us. We are going to need more details though. Did it hurt? How long did it take? What exactly did Dakota stick-and-poke onto you, Olivia?
Already declaring herself a “big fan” of tattoos during an appearance on The Late Late Show with James Corden, Dakota previously admitted to having around 11 or 12 tattoos of her own – including one she gave herself that reads “I love you”. Does that make her a “tattoo fiend”? Corden thinks so but Johnson disagrees… “11 is conservative”, she claims. I’m torn between wanting to disagree with James Corden just out of principle and conceding that he may be right on this one occasion.